The First Confession - St. Mark's Church, Batu Kawa

Mixed Race Relationship

Yesterday, something strikes me about one facts about relationship. Most of us would thinks that if we are Chinese, then get a Chinese to be your couple and if you are other races, get your own race to be your match. How true is this?

Most peopl says the reason to find your own race to be your partner is in term of communications. Let me give some scenario. If your girlfriend is a Chinese, speaking English and her whole family is speaking English, while your family is fully speaking Mandarin. Is this still consider as Chinese couples or is it ABC couples or still is a chinese couples? Let say, your parents can only speaks Mandarin while your girlfriend parents can only speak English. Does communication comes in? So, is finding Chinese would ease communication between the two families? Both are Chinese but still communication is a big question mark here. Does this reason still imply in choosing the same race to your love partner?

Some other would say eating habits and culture is different. Indeed is very different. Chinese people like to have soups in each meal. Other races might likes to have curry in each meals, pork served all the time, etc etc etc.. But is this really an obstacle? Everyone have different taste of food. Relationship is about two couple together getting through thick and thin. So, if food really a big obstacles here? I know that main thing is about culture. Chinese people likes to have red colors thing in the house. Others might not. Well, why does God creates tolerations? This is actually the way where this character comes in. Even if our partner are the same race, they might have different cultures with us. One scenario here is let say a Hakka and a Teochew is getting married. Are their culture same? Traditional food for Hakka are "Lui Cha" while Teochew people might not even know what is that. So, does this come into account that cultures is the obstacle?

However, there is one major reason that I can't deny. Religions. So, no comment about this one....

Let say two people with different character together but they are of the same race. Can this clicks? Nobody knows but God. Relationship is purely from God and no one should try to do anything to stop it. Even if we fails dozens of time in relationship, we should take the failure as one step forward, not one step backward. Learn as we fails. Be strong as we falls.

I have some comments that we Chinese must get Chinese boyfriend. Well, my dad speaks Hokkien and Hakka only. What if the guy that I find only speaks his language and his parents don't speaks Hakka or Hokkien but Mandarin. Does this back to square one? Again, English are use as one communications. But, we are both Chinese! What does this makes a different if I find other races partner?

A friend of mine even commented to me that even I get one Chinese guy, it might not be the genuine one for me. One simple reason... I can't even differentiate left and right in mandarin!!!! I'm Hakka but I can't speak Hakka, my mum is Teochew but I can't speaks that too. I only speaks half tong Hokkien and half tong Mandarin. Sometimes at home, I speaks English. So what does that makes me?

My boyfriend say this at early stage. Most Chinese girl would only get themselves a Chinese guy. Is this true? For me, we girls only want someone that could gives us the sense of security and protects us, understands us and is the reflections of us. Isn't this more meaningful than finding one that is same race?

So for those out there, even if you have a different race partner, don't give yourself this excuse to keep spare tyres ya .. Finding someone deep inside us is more meaningful than eyeing on someone who are same race!