Jokes of Ah Beng

-


Ah Beng bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
"My Mobile No. Has changed. Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610"

Ah Beng: I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College.
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are studying him.

Ah Beng: Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Ah Beng: Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.

Ah Beng: If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Ah Beng: No, I'll also stay with your sister.

Ah Beng: People consider me as "GOD"
Wife: How do you know??
Ah Beng: When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
Oh GOD! U have come again.

Ah Beng complained to the police: "Sir, all items are ! missing,
except the TV in my house."
Police: "How the thief did not take TV?"
Ah Beng: "I was watching TV news..."

Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying "Parking Fine"
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole "Thanks for compliment."

How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases
the board.

Once A Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on the other.
So the man asked him why that was so. He replied that the weather forecast
announced that on the one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it
would be hot.

Ah Beng is in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
Says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"

Ah Beng: Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
Ah Beng - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

Teacher: "I killed a person!" convert this sentence into future tense
Ah Beng: The future tense is "u will go to jail"

Ah Beng told his servant: "Go and water the plants!"
Servant: "It's already raining."
Ah Beng: "So what? Take an umbrella and go."

A man asked Ah Beng why Ahmad Badawi goes walking in the Evening and not
in the morning. Ah Beng replied Ahmad Badawi is PM not AM

Comments

Anonymous said…
Teacher: "I killed a person!" convert this sentence into future tense
Ah Beng: The future tense is "u will go to jail"

I had a great laugh at this. hahaha.. Thanks for sharing
10:25 PM
Dav DiDi said…
Hi Daniel,

Hehehe ... my pleasure to make you laugh . hehehe ...

:)
8:11 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

'Ma Li Chai'/'Mani Chai', also known as Cangkuk Manis

-
Image
While googling for news about 'malichai', it turns out that I hardly get anything that I am looking for, so this triggers me to write something about this local vegetables that I believe, can only be found in Sarawak. 'Mali chai' is easily planted and grow quite fast as well. In fact, this is the only vegetables that I planted and it didn't fail on me! With its stick, just plant it on the ground and leave the rain and sun to takes care of the rest. Hahaha... 'Mali chai' is a word in hokkien that mostly use in Kuching. 'Chai' means vegetables. Hakka people called it 'su choi'. Well, this vege doesn't seems to have an English name. If we are to translate from BM to English, it definitely sounds weird - Sweet Hook. I think anyone who hear 'sweet hook' will not be keen to try it out.. So, how do 'mali chai' looks like? I've snap the photos of this vegetables at my garden. Actually, I've just harvest the vegetables few ...
Read more

Cozy Cafe, Jalan Song

-
Image
Feeling hungry for something different on lunch time? Another place you can think of will be this restaurant - The Cozy Cafe. It is opposite One TJ with a black signboard. The environment is indeed cozy and warmth. Taste wise not bad but I can say that the service is a little weird. We order tea and they only permitted to give us 2 cup. Hhmmmm, I thought that we can just ask them to refill the pot wit hot water and share the tea amongst us. Guess this is how they earn more - limiting the number of sharing per tea pot. Oh well, got to just follow their rules. And this is what we ordered - sharing portion between a few of us. After all, ladies are small eaters. Mushroom soup with garlic bread Fish and chips Spaghetti Carbonara with hot dogs  Enjoy your lunch yea...
Read more

Hong Kong Bun - Xiao Ba Wang

-
Image
Have anyone been to this place? I actually asked SK to help in translating them into English. According to her 'xiao' refers to small while 'ba wang' is gangster. Hhmmmm.... It is located right opposite the Stutong Market. BF say this is second branch. For me, this is the first time I saw it. This is a good place for 'pao' lovers to have their breakfast. BF and I went there once for breakfast since it's on the way to our workplace. First impression - I like it here. Not much traffics and the place is clean. Second impression - what happen to the day dreaming waitresses?? I want to take my order! Third impression - do they know that we are waiting? The food is nice. For BF, it is superb. He has been eating 'pao' for breakfast for almost everyday. Well maybe like what he say, for me everything is the same. But I must say the dim sum is nice. Anyway, I think they should really improve the workers efficiency. The other day, BF forgotten whether he had ...
Read more