Love & Relationship - If It's Yours, It Will Be Yours

This morning, I wake up, feeling a little bit sad without any reason. Had my early bath, I went to work. While waiting for bf to reach the office, I check my friendster and realize that relationship is something that is very fragile and full with challenge.

Some people get married after knowing their partner for few years. Some, would get married although they have known the partner for few months. Not all of them end up divorce but sometimes, those that known each other for few months and get married, usually sustain a very long term relationship. Isn't this wonderful? Their loves are strengthen as time passes. Indeed, in each relationship, there are certain times that couple would argue and quarel. But that doesn't mean that it is the end of it. We should always listen to our partner. Even if it has been 10 yrs, still listening to each other is the key to long term relationship.

However, there are also some that had been dating for years but end up breaking up as their partner has been assuming that the other half of them should listen to them. I known a fellow that broke up after been with the same guy for 11 years. Imagine that!! A couple that had been dating for 11 years end up not in marriage but break up. Another friend of mine, broke up after spending 7 years with the partner. Why is it that couples that dates for years ending up breaking up? Well, I guess we all have no answer for it. Another friend, broke up although they had plan to get married on the next year. Some would suddenly realize that the couple is not the one they want, after spending all those precious years with them. An example, like a friend of mine that always dreamt of a guy that don't smoke but ended up dating a guy that smokes for 7 years. At the end, realizing that he is not the one as the one she is looking for is someone who don't smoke. What the hack? After spending 7 years then realizing that smokers is not one of the dating list? Then why is it that she starts the relationship at first place? Isn't that she suppose to accept who he is? Or is she thinking and hope to change the guy from smokers to non smokers? But what is the difference made if the guy quit smoking because of her and not because of himself? Another lesson I learnt is that don't try to change anyone to what we want, but encourage them to change to a better them on their own free will. Yeah, FREE WILL and NOT to change BECAUSE OF ME.

A guess, the key to long term relationship isn't just to judge what a person have or what a person don't have. We should always learn and accept our partner's weaknesses and not just keep on comparing. No one is perfect. Every decision made, there are consequences. Can we really find someone that are very good, etc etc? Instead of cherish the one we found, we tends to judge the one we found.

I'm in a process of learning to accept the bad and goods of the person I found. It is still a learning process and I think everyone should learn from mistake and not simply going to a road without thinking of consequences.

If it is yours, it's yours. If it is not yours, it's not your no matter how you try to get it.


Faith said…
in term of relationship, it is very difficult to judge. I have many friends who also broken up with their half after 7-8 years relationship. Sometimes, the feeling just different.

think positively, break up is better than divorce
rebeena said…
I tell myself to be SABAR!
Coz it's tired to argue of small matter...hehehe...

As long as 2are happy & one dnt start the fire and the other one wouldnt take the stick with fire and chase the one who start the it will never ends...hahaha

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