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Once a Mother, Always Your Mother

I remember that when I am small, my parents would put me under the care of my dad's sister. On weekdays, I will be with my her and went back to my own home during weekend. Due to this, I mistakenly known her as my mom. Well, yeah, each time I call "Mama", both my own mother and my mistaken mother would answer. My relationship with my mistaken mother is more close too. Anyway, I never neglect or thinks that my own mom is not my mom or anything like that.

Previously, I always thinks that I have not done good enough when my own mom is still alive. After yesterday, I think I am far better and had done the best to please her. At least, I accompany her in hospitals each time she needs to stay in hospitals.

My cousin had invited my dad and me for a family gathering dinner yesterday. Surprisingly, she didn't invite her own mother. I was actually shock and felt awkward to be there when her own mother is left out from the "Family Gathering". What is the meaning of family when you left our your own mother in the list?

OK, here's a bit intro. My cousin is my second mom's daughter. When she is kid, my second uncle adopted her to help lesson my second mom's burden. Something similar to my case just the opposite way. So financially, second uncle is stable while my second mom is not so stable. Since then, she had taken herself as my uncle's daughter and totally ignored my second mom. Why?

For me, there is no good justification of why is she ignoring her own mother. During her labor, her own mother had standby and help in taking care of the baby. My second uncle adopted her only so that she would have a better life and lesson his sister's financial. For me, this is not a good reason to abandon your mother from the family list. Not only that, she seems to brain washing her kids on the existence of someone who is their true grandmother.

If she could do so, then I can say that my mother is my second mom and I have no own mom. But both did takes good care of me and I have no reason to neglect any of them.

I really felt awkward in yesterday dinner when all my second uncle's family is together in the gathering and my cousin had introduce all her son's wife's relatives to all of us. Well, does it have any meaning if she don't have the guts to tell them she is actually born by another person?

Today is her son's wedding and I'm sitting here in my office, escaping the tea ceremony. My reason is simple. First, I do not want to be served tea by nephew that is older than me (childish excuse). Second reason is that my cousin didn't even think of inviting her own mother for the tea ceremony and I presume she had excluded her from the main table. There is no reason for me to attend the tea ceremony when her own mother is not there.. For me, meaningless.

Maybe I felt this way because her own mother that neglected, is my Godmom. For me, once a mother, always will be your mother. No matter how you neglect her existence, she still exist. I just pray that one day, my cousin will know what she did and that it is totally wrong.

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